What is Great Sex?
It is something we all want to have, but how do we have it?
How do we transcend from the ordinary exchange of energy and have the type of sex that is not only physically gratifying, but emotionally, mentally, and spiritually as well?
An experience that feels so whole, so beautiful, and so perfect, that you can completely lose yourself in it. An experience that heals, deepens the connection between you and your partner, and ultimately shows you more of who you are.
All aspects of great sex can be neatly compiled into one small yet infinitely vast word, intimacy. And this is what Tantra is all about, being intimate with ourselves first, and then our partners. To have great sex, we must drop our defenses and show our partners the true person we really are.
Right before sex is such an exciting time!
We are removing our clothes, layer by layer, showing our partners our bodies, our private areas that no one else sees. Isn’t it a wonderful thing the first time you saw your partner undress in front of you, seeing them there in such an arousing, beautiful, and vulnerable state? Like that, we must also remove the layers of our defenses. We have to let go of the resistance and bondage that is holding us back. The resistance, the drama that we hold onto is not truly us. We have picked it up throughout our lifetime, perhaps in childhood or when we were older through traumatic experiences. And these experiences of fear, shame, inferiority, powerlessness, and sadness bind us. They are not us but memories and all associated energy and feelings, that have been frozen in time, and are stuck in our bodies. They prevent us from being who we really are, from knowing why we are here, and from knowing where we are going!
Truly, the innate state of human beings is pure love, but most people don’t feel comfortable in a place so free, so open, it is infinite.
They feel vulnerable, they feel scared and limited. “It’s so big, I feel so exposed, I might get hurt again!” Instead of stepping into this higher vibration, many people act out and distract themselves; they might have sex with multiple partners searching for that release for example. They get bored, perhaps go have sex with someone else, try something new. But they are acting, feeding their personal dramas through this behavior. They are removing their clothes but holding onto everything else. Yes this may be great tension release but it is not great sex. And sadly, it doesn’t take you anywhere; you get stuck in a cycle of tension / release / tension / release / find someone else or try something else / repeat.
So we must work on ourselves, showing ourselves to our partners and allowing ourselves to be vulnerable, knowing that we will be safe, comforted, and supported.
And what better way to work on ourselves than through sex. All the tools are there to utilize; movement, breathing, sound, vulnerability, love, and pleasure. Little by little, step by step, we become freer and freer. Vulnerability is not the destination but the pathway to true happiness, love, and bliss. And this is the goal of my Tantric sessions, to have people, with or without a partner, living free and blissful in their bodies. During the sessions, I guide you through bodywork, energywork, breathwork, offering my support and knowledge, all to help you remove whatever it is that is blocking you from being who you really are.
Our bliss, our level of connection with our True Self is what we take with us when we leave our bodies and go on our journey to wherever it is that we go. Nothing else goes with you.
So what could be more important than the pursuit of blissfulness and freedom in our bodies right now?
Written by Frank Paul, founder of Tantric Serenity. Copyright ©2012 Tantric Serenity. All rights reserved.